COLUMBO: HOW TO DIAL A MURDER (TV)

Summary

One in this series of police dramas in which Los Angeles homicide detective Lt. Columbo's unassuming manner masks his keen intelligence and sharp investigative abilities.

Dr. Eric Mason, a famous psychologist specializing in the influence of words on people's lives, trains his Doberman pinschers, Laurel and Hardy, to respond to a specific set of stimuli: they come whenever they hear a phone ring and are conditioned to kill when they hear the word "rosebud." He tests these responses on a straw dummy hanging from a hook on his kitchen. At one of his seminars, Dr. Mason speaks with his assistant, Dr. Charlie Hunter, about the recent death of his wife Lorraine six months ago. She was killed in an automobile accident. Dr. Mason says that Lorraine was having an affair with an unknown party, and Charlie becomes uncomfortable. He invites Charlie over for tennis later, and leaves to go to a physical examination for his heart.

Charlie arrives at Dr. Mason's estate along with Laurel and Hardy. He waves hello to Joanne Nicholls, a young woman living in Dr. Mason's guest house, as she swims in his pool. Meanwhile, Dr. Mason is left alone during his physical to rest, and secretly places a phone call to his house, answered by Charlie in Dr. Mason's kitchen. He gets Charlie to say "rosebud," thus triggering the command word and causing the dogs to maul him to death. The police investigate, and Dr. Mason comes across Columbo playing with Laurel and Hardy before they are taken away to an animal control office. Columbo asks about Dr. Mason's work in conditioned responses, which he refers to as "life control." Columbo also notes that the dog's seemingly affectionate demeanor is incongruous with their assault on Charlie, and Dr. Mason says that usually the dogs get along well with most people, and that Charlie must have done something to provoke them.

Dr. Mason takes Columbo to a room filled with old film memorabilia; he explains that collecting such items is one of his passions. The collection includes the "rosebud" sled from the film "Citizen Kane." Columbo asks about whether he called Charlie at any point, but Dr. Mason denies this. However, the evidence suggests that a call was made: the police found the kitchen phone receiver dangling off the hook with a fast busy signal, indicating that a call received by the house was interrupted. Columbo also notices an old rusty baby spotlight amongst Dr. Mason's collection, used for lighting film sets. He also finds it strange that whoever called Charlie must have heard the dogs attacking, but did not call the police, as the report about the murder was made by Joanne. Columbo decides to visit the guest house to talk to Joanne, who seems disturbed from finding Charlie's bloody corpse. She explains how she came to live with Dr. Mason after meeting him at one of his courses at her college. He offered to let her stay in his guest house if she helped him take care of the main house. She knew both Charlie and Lorraine, and says that she sometimes helps care for the dogs. She notes that Dr. Mason often left the house on weekends and would take the dogs with him. Columbo gets her to reveal that she was swimming underwater at the time of the murder, and thus couldn't have heard the phone in the kitchen ring.

Columbo leaves and Dr. Mason comes to see Joanne. She is extremely upset over recent events, and he tries to get her to calm down. Dr. Mason hints that Joanne's real reason for staying with him is her attraction to him, although he says that a relationship between them is impossible. All that Joanne wants now is to go home. Columbo speaks with Mrs. Cochran, a professional dog trainer, to gain insight about why Laurel and Hardy would unexpectedly attack. She says that some dogs "revert" to a more primal state and attack, but it is unheard of for a dog to return to normal behavior afterwards as Laurel and Hardy seemingly have. Columbo observes as Mrs. Cochran gives one of her dogs a "kill command," making him attack one of her aides in protective clothing. She explains that a dog can be trained to respond to any word imaginable, and in any way that the trainer chooses.

Dr. Mason visits the animal control office to see his dogs. He tries to feed them chocolate in order to kill them and cover up evidence of his murder, but Columbo enters and prevents him from doing so. Columbo asks him about pieces of straw found on Dr. Mason's kitchen floor, which he claims was from a case of wine he ordered the previous week. When asked about his weekend trips, he claims he would often take his dogs to the beach. After Dr. Mason leaves, Columbo tries a number of potential command words on Laurel and Hardy, but they do not respond. However, he notices that they stand at attention when they hear a phone ring. Later, Dr, Mason encounters Columbo again and they sit down in a meeting-room together. Columbo voices his suspicions that the dogs were specifically trained to kill, and makes it seem as though he thinks someone was trying to kill Dr. Mason and got Charlie instead. Furthermore, Columbo makes it seem as though the culprit could be an enemy of Dr. Mason's who also could have engineered the death of his wife; Dr. Mason offers no real answer to these claims.

That night, Joanne heads into Dr. Mason's house to speak to him, only to encounter Columbo instead. He convinces her to go into the kitchen with him, where he asks her to point out the exact spot where she found Charlie's body. He notices a hook in the kitchen ceiling which Joanne does not recognize. She explains that when she found the body she tried to call the police on Dr. Mason's other phone, an antique in his collection room, but it was unplugged, so she used the guest house's phone. Columbo notices that Dr. Mason's baby spotlight came from Callahan's Film Ranch, an old western movie set. He travels to the abandoned set and discovers a hanging chain which shows signs of being recently tampered with.

Dr. Mason enters Charlie's home and rifles through his desk drawer, finding a series of snapshots of Charlie and Lorraine together. He manages to pocket them just before Columbo enters the room. Columbo asks about one of Charlie's suits; he could not find the jacket for it, but Dr. Mason claims not to know anything about it. Columbo inquires about Charlie's love life, and discovers he had a reputation for being something of a ladies' man. That night, Dr. Mason visits Joanne, who is in the midst of packing up her things. She reveals that she knows that Lorraine and Charlie were having an affair. He says she must never tell anyone and is seemingly about to strangle her when Columbo enters and interrupts. Columbo and Dr. Mason sit down together and talk about psychology, conducting a word-association exercise with each other. On his way out, Columbo comments on the gate to Dr. Mason's house. It is a replica of the gate to Charles Foster Kane's mansion in "Citizen Kane," and the two of them discuss the opening minutes of the film.

Columbo, having recorded his entire conversation with Dr. Mason on a tape recorder, plays it back for Laurel and Hardy, who have no reaction to any of the words spoken. Columbo receives a telephone call as he accidentally leaves the recorder playing, trying to convince a judge not to have the dogs put to sleep yet. He returns to find that the dogs are attacking the recorder upon hearing the word "rosebud." He takes them to Mrs. Cochran, and the two of them spend long hours working with Laurel and Hardy. Eventually Dr. Mason arrives home to find a straw dummy hanging in his kitchen, and his dogs arriving at the sound of his phone ringing. Columbo enters and explains that he set up this demonstration.

He points out that at the time of the murder, the antique phone was disconnected, leaving the kitchen phone as the only one for Charlie to answer. He produces a tennis ball with dog tooth marks in it found at Callahan's Film Ranch, pointing out that it is the same kind of tennis ball Dr. Mason uses on his private court. He says that the ranch was the site used to train the dogs to kill on command. Columbo then produces a strip of cloth torn from Charlie's missing jacket, which he believes was used to get the dogs accustomed to his scent. He also produces a snapshot of Charlie and Lorraine, which he acquired just before Dr. Mason entered his house. With all this evidence, Columbo accuses Dr. Mason of murdering Lorraine and Charlie due to their affair with each other. Next he produces Dr. Mason's electrocardiogram readings from the physical exam he was taking at the time of the murder, noting that at a time when he was supposed to be at rest, his heart rate skyrocketed just before the instant of the murder. Dr. Mason tries to give the attack command to Laurel and Hardy in order to kill Columbo, but instead of mauling him they merely lick his face. Columbo reveals that he and Mrs. Cochran re-trained the dogs to accept different instructions to the command word, revealing that he discovered the phrase from his recording of their conversation. Left with no other options, Dr. Mason admits defeat. Commercials deleted.

Details

• NETWORK: NBC
• DATE: April 15, 1978 9:30 PM
• RUNNING TIME: 1:12:26
• COLOR/B&W: Color
• CATALOG ID: B:74422
• GENRE: Drama, police/private detective
• SUBJECT HEADING: Drama, police/private detective
• SERIES RUN: NBC - TV series, 1968-1978; ABC - 1989-2003
• COMMERCIALS: N/A

CREDITS

• Richard Alan Simmons … Producer
• Anthony Kiser … Associate Producer
• James Frawley … Director
• Richard Levinson … Created by
• William Link … Created by
• Tom Lazarus … Writer
• Anthony Lawrence … Writer
• Patrick Williams … Music by
• Peter Falk … Cast, Columbo
• Nicol Williamson … Cast, Dr. Eric Mason
• Kim Cattrall … Cast, Joanne Nicholls
• Joel Fabiani … Cast, Dr. Charles Hunter
• Frank Aletter … Cast, Dr. Garrison
• Tricia O'Neil … Cast, Mrs. Cochran
• Ed Begley Jr. … Cast, Officer Stein
• Fred J. Gordon … Cast, Technician